Potato Chip Lobster Roll?: Lay's New England Lobster Roll

Lay's Potato Chips released eight new temporary chip flavors as this past summer in an effort to highlight the local cuisine of regions around the country – a promotion called Taste of America. The eight flavors were available in stores regionally for a short time – Chesapeake Bay Crab Spice (Mid-Atlantic), Pimento Cheese (Southeast), Cajun Spice (Gulf Coast) Chile Con Queso (Southwest), Deep Dish Pizza (mid-America), Fried Pickles (Midwest), Thai Sweet Chile (Pacific Northwest) and, why we're all here today – New England Lobster Roll.

When I first saw this, I was skeptical. I might have even made a PFFFFFT sound knowing full well not even the most skilled potato chip maker could pull off this flavor. And definitely not without it tasting like the Portland waterfront smells on a 95-degree day. And honestly, I wasn't keen on putting that flavor in my mouth.

But you know the story... one friend buys a bag, then another friend buys a bag and the next thing that happens is you've been peer pressured into buying a bag and trying them. But it's a friggin chip and I knew it wasn't going to kill me to give it a go. So I ate the whole bag... for the good of the blog!

Once I actually had this bag of chips in my hands, I couldn't wait to stuff a whole handful in my mouth. I'm not going to lie... I'm not the most graceful chip eater. I love chips so much, I can't eat them fast enough. I wanted to bust open the bag in the car on the way home from the store, but surprisingly, I showed a little restraint and waited...

I know the suspense is killing you so I'll just come out and say it: THESE CHIPS TASTED ABSOLUTELY NOTHING LIKE A LOBSTER ROLL. There wasn't so much as even the essence of lobster. It was almost as if the taste testers of these chips had never even been in the same area code as a lobster. When I perused the ingredients of this product, nowhere did I see the mention of lobster in any form... but one ingredient listed was called New England Lobster Roll seasoning. Huh? I call bullshit. Lay's threw some spices together and voila – let's give it a fancy name!

Here's where you're probably thinking I hated these chips with a passion. Nothing is farther from the truth. While the chips tasted as far from a lobster roll as humanly possible, they were very tasty. I detected the base chip to be sour cream and onion which is generally not my favorite Lay's flavor but the seasoning boosted them to a different level. And the "seasoning"? Definitely NOT lobster roll flavored, but familiar. My guess is they just took the same flavor from the Chesapeake Bay Crab Spice and threw it on these chips. HELLOOOOOOO... have you ever heard of Old Bay??

I'd eat another bag in a heartbeat if they were still available in the stores. I would just imagine they were called something other than New England Lobster Roll... because that is a LIE!

Harpswell Neck Lobster Roll: Estes Lobster House

Harpswell, Maine is one of those towns I just love to explore but don't get there enough. Seems that whenever we find ourselves up that way, we always hang a left and head to Orrs Island – pulled by the promises of great food (especially the lobster rolls) and amazing desserts at Morse's Cribstone Grill.

So this one Saturday, my lobster roll hunting co-pilot for the day suggested we explore some of the hidden gems of Harpswell – and who am I to turn down that kind of adventure? I would love to tell you all about those hidden gems, but then the secret would be out and, well, if you don't know about them already then you'll just have to use your imagination. But you know... exploring off-the-beaten-path beaches really works up an appetite!

Estes Lobster House is a place I've probably passed a dozen times in various trips to this part of the state but never stopped. It's literally on a strip of Harpswell Neck Road that might be 100 feet from water on one side to water on the other side. It's a great location with a spectacular view and it's been around since 1947! The restaurant is situated so that if you're sitting outside on the patio in the evening, you'll (hopefully) be treated to a stunning sunset.

Estes has been on my mental list of places to try a lobster roll so I figured, hell, I'm already here... let's give it a shot. The menu describes their offering... Fresh Lobster Roll - Hand-picked lobster meat lightly mixed with mayo on a toasted oversized roll.
(Comes with fries OR coleslaw) $20.99

The first red flag was "toasted oversized roll." This scared me just a tiny bit because, to me, that phrase just screams "brioche!" And just because I had ONE good experience with the brioche style roll, I'm not all in (or even really partially in) on these doughy monsters. Strike one... this thing was so bready and giant, I wanted to cry. Just look at the picture and tell me you don't think that is just waaaay too much bread.

Ok... next step... let's see how the lobster tastes. It was lightly dressed with mayo so that's nice and the lobster tasted pretty good. Unfortunately, there just wasn't enough of it to overtake the bread. And as I got to the end, there were some pieces of my lobster that tasted a slightly slimy which made me gag just a little. Maybe that was a result of the heavy ratio of claw meat in the roll? I dunno... it was weird.  The coleslaw was great though...

A part of me wants to go back to Estes to try some fried seafood or something else on their menu. It's such a cool spot and the place is like a complete throwback inside... something tells me that they need another chance to impress me. So don't shun it just because the lobster roll wasn't great!

The Other Wiscasset Lobster Roll: Sprague's Lobster

One Friday last summer, I made the decision to finally try Red's Eats in Wiscasset, ME. As promised by basically everyone, it was delicious – a ridiculous lobster roll with an obscene amount of lobster meat. But it was also a pain in the ass. The line was enormous, even getting there a 1/2 hour before they opened, and we waited over an hour for that tasty little morsel. So your feelings are definitely conflicted – am I blissfully happy because the lobster roll is just THAT GOOD... or am I bitterly annoyed that it took THAT LONG?!

Several people asked if I had ever been to Sprague's Lobster directly across the street. Huh? There's another lobster roll joint across the street? I mean I probably passed it a hundred times but never really knew anything about it. So this summer, Sprague's gets its turn and I was anxious to see how they compared to their greedy neighbors across Route 1.

It was an overcast Saturday and when we arrived in Wiscasset, it was the same ol' shit. A crawling line of traffic slowly snaking its way down Route 1 through the quaint downtown area. When we finally made it to our destination, Red's had a line that looked to be a good hour and a half to two hours long... and I was able to find a parking spot in Sprague's small lot so things were looking pretty good.

The line at Sprague's was maybe three people. Perfect. The expansive dock was a welcome spot with a view of the Sheepscot River, a plethora of picnic tables and even a few retailers peddling some crafty wares. You place your order at the little shack and they call your number... like any normal seafood takeout spot. And their menu is rather extensive with several non-seafood options in addition to anything from lobster and crab rolls to full-on lobster dinners.

So naturally, I ordered a lobster roll. (I mean, that would be pretty funny if I spent all this time writing a blog post and just ordered a hamburger.) The sign was simple - Lobster Roll - $21.99 - no other information. (Be warned, this place is cash-only but they do have an ATM right there.)

Now for the good stuff. Upon first inspection, the lobster roll appeared to be top notch. The traditional hot dog bun was nicely toasted and there was a substantial amount of naked lobster meat... I love a place that has the confidence to serve their lobster with no dressing. The roll tasted fresh and delicious but there were a few pieces of tail meat that were just a tad chewier than I prefer. And the pieces were big so the fact that you have to try and bite the tail meat in half will often highlight it's chewiness. But it definitely didn't ruin my day because in the end, it was still pretty damn tasty.

Overall, I thought it was a great spot - so much less stressful than Red's. The nice girl at the take-out window also told us it was ok if we brought our cooler of beer to have with our lobster rolls. These places will always get high praise because who doesn't love a BYOB establishment. She just suggested we go to the hidden picnic tables (which honestly were the best because they were right on the river side of the dock.)

#1 Beer Bar in the World Lobster Roll: Ebenezer's Pub

One does not generally visit a pub once named by Beer Advocate as the #1 Beer Bar in the World for a lobster roll. And I didn't either. I just happened to stumble upon one by mistake in my quest to imbibe in some tasty beer. I'm not sure anyone goes to Ebenezer's Restaurant and Pub in Lovell, Maine for anything other than their ridiculous beer list. And I can attest... it was RIDIC! Double-sided tap list of some serious stuff you can't get anywhere 'round here. As well as a buttload of cans and bottles that we didn't even get into.

First, let's get through the beer. Had I not been driving and had someone designated to cart my drunk ass around, I could've stayed at this place for hours and hours sampling the sours they had to offer. Although it would've most certainly drained my bank account because this stuff is not cheap. I opted for the Alvinne/Lauger ICH BIN EIN BERLINER FRAMBOOS - Raspberry Berliner Weiss. A collaboration beer brewed with rye, wheat, aged in oak with raspberries for a year. That damn glass of beer was $15! Worth it though.

When I finally made it to the menu, I was surprised and intrigued to find a lobster roll. A lobster roll that claimed to be made with the meat of a WHOLE LOBSTER. Before Red's in Wiscasset, I would've found this to be exciting... now I just expect that's the minimum that's going to be on a roll. There is indeed a whole lobster on this roll and you can tell because they keep all the parts whole. The giant lobster parts were tossed with mayo and served on a traditional toasted roll with a little bit of lettuce on the bottom. They give you a choice of either fries or coleslaw and charge you $24.95.

I think you might know where I'm going with this. If you even know me a little, you can guess that while I was happy to be served a lobster roll with the meat of a whole lobster, I would very much prefer that the lobster is not in GIANT CHUNKS! I had to reassemble that damn roll about a dozen times while eating it because those big pieces just don't like to stay in their bun. Lucky for them, the lobster itself didn't suck because I would've made me very angry. The lettuce was stupid and the mayo just a touch heavy, but overall it tasted pretty good. The slaw was tasty too!

To finish off my visit to Ebenezer's, and because it was my birthday, I also enjoyed a traditional Belgian waffle with chocolate sauce and ice cream. If you get just one thing to eat at this joint, get the waffle. It was glorious! But definitely try lots of beer. Beer is good.

Yarmouth Brewery Lobster Roll: Brickyard Hollow

These days you can't swing a dead cat without hitting a cool new local craft brewery in Maine. For us beer lovers, that's a good thing! Brickyard Hollow in Yarmouth opened their doors in late June and if the traffic is consistent with what I saw the night I was there, they're doing a booming business. It helps if you're brewing good beer AND serving good food! 

On the night I dined at the Hollow, I felt lucky to find myself two seats at the bar because it was packed. The atmosphere is neat – just like most breweries nowadays – with both indoor and outdoor seating options. The beer selection isn't the largest, but they're still new and I'm sure will continue to add more options – I tried the Kolsh and then opted for a guest tap - Banded Brewing's Wicked Bueno (if you care!)

As usual, I was excited to see a lobster roll on the menu and as usual, I couldn't resist. Plus the waiter assured me there was a lot of lobster in the roll – more than at his other job at Diamond's Edge. (Note to self: Don't order the lobster roll at Diamond's Edge.) Even though I was skeptical at the brioche roll and the price tag of "Market Price," I pulled the trigger. 

Lobster Roll

Maine lobster roll, lettuce, mayonnaise, brioche bun, french fries ~ Market Price

If I could make an angry face emoji in a blog post, I totally would because FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, would you just put a damn price on the menu! It was $19 by the way... 😡 (oh wait, I can.)

Overall the roll was pretty tasty. The lobster was fresh, cooked well and flavorful. The light mayo coupled with a squeeze of lemon made for a tasty treat. While I had a good brioche experience recently at The Clam Digger, this one left me feeling over breaded. The base of the roll was thick and overpowering. PLUS... not only did they add the dreaded lettuce, but it was shredded and that shit is impossible to remove without deconstructing the whole damn roll. 

The lobster roll came with just fries and a pickle. The fries were absolutely delicious! They were like steak fries but thinner and cooked well done – so almost like a combination between a fry and a chip. I'd go back for the fries alone! And pickles are useless. Don't even bother putting it on my plate.

Check out Brickyard Hollow – if even just for the beer. But I hear the other food is pretty good too!

Peaks Island Lobster Roll: The Inn On Peaks Island

One recent sweltering Sunday, we found ourselves trying to beat the heat by heading out into Casco Bay. We boarded a packed car ferry and set sail for Peaks Island where we rented bikes and rode around the island for an hour. (FYI: It wasn't much cooler than the mainland.) You know what riding bikes does (besides making me feel incredibly old and out of shape)? It works up an appetite!

We decided on The Inn On Peaks Island for lunch and were happy to have a table inside out of the heat. It's not a bad little place although the beer selection leaves a little to be desired. I was excited to see they had a lobster roll special, and despite my tendency to steer clear of lobster rolls that aren't a regular menu item, I ordered it! I mean how hard is it to construct a lobster roll? You'd be surprised how easy it is for a place to suck at it.

The Inn on Peaks sucks at a lobster roll. I didn't even need to taste it to come to that conclusion. For $18, I expect a little more than a fistful of lobster on my bread. I also expect that if you're going to jip me on said lobster, why don't you at least try to spread it out to cover the whole hot dog bun so it looks like... well, not like the picture. When it arrived in front of me, I almost asked the waiter if he was serious. But I'm pretty sure he was since he didn't apologize for it or offer to bring more lobster.

And that's not even the whole story. If you've been a loyal reader of this blog, you know I like my buns buttery and toasted. This one was the opposite of that. One side looked like it may have brushed against a hot surface at some point, but the other side was basically cold. I was confused. Was the kitchen staff drunk? Suffering from heat stroke? Eating hallucinogenics? Pissed off about life in general? Whatever is going on in your life, I think you should take a certain amount of pride in building a respectable lobster roll in Maine. This one was clearly made by a four-year-old with a broken arm and an attitude problem.

The only one tiny little bright spot in this experience was the taste of that tiny blob of lobster. It was lightly dressed with an herbed mayo and the meat tasted fresh and tender. It had real potential. The meat is half the battle – once you've perfected that, the rest is gravy.

Disappointed, we headed back to the dock to wait for the ferry home where we were entertained by Reggae Sunday amateurs that were so drunk by 2:30 in the afternoon, they needed to be escorted home. Nothing like standing in line to board the boat, wondering if you're out of the splatter zone in case they hurl.

West Commercial Lobster Roll: Clam Digger Restaurant

Every once in a while something sneaks up on you and surprises the shit out of you when you least expect it. And that's what happened the day I visited the newly dubbed Clam Digger Seafood Restaurant at the west end of Commercial Street on the outskirts of Portland's famed Old Port. You see... I drive by this establishment five mornings a week on my way to work. For the last million years or so, it has been a little run down shack called Benny's and as uninviting as it has always looked, I had this deep urge to try their lobster roll.

Over the past several months, I noticed some changes happening at the old Benny's – some improvements, some new picnic tables with nice umbrella's, some sprucing up of the old shack – and lastly, a new sign calling the upgrade Clam Digger. I was intrigued, to say the least. So one sunny lunchtime, I grabbed my favorite lunch buddy and headed on down to investigate.

Naturally, I ordered the lobster roll. Duh. The prices were reasonable for downtown Portland - the lobster roll alone was $19.99 and I upgraded with fries and coleslaw for an extra couple bucks. The next time I go back, I'll know that I don't even remotely need the fries and coleslaw – it was just too much food! (My lunch date didn't even finish her lobster roll! *insert surprised face emoji here*

Remember that thing I said about things sneaking up on you and surprising you? When I got my lobster roll, three things stuck out to me – things I generally despise when it comes to my lobster roll – the dreaded brioche roll, lettuce and big giant chunks of lobster. My hopes dimmed... I really wanted this place to be awesome.

So let's discuss...

First, the roll. The brioche... wasn't half bad. It actually didn't taste as briochey as I've had in the past and it was buttered up and grilled delightfully – I actually liked the damn thing. Yeah, I'm surprised too.

Second, the lettuce. A big leafy piece of lettuce was gently placed in the side so it was easily plucked out without dismantling the whole damn roll. Yay for garnishy lettuce!

And third, the big lobster chunks. This lobster was cooked to near perfection. Each chuck easily bit through without pulling a big piece off and into my lap. I was impressed. My only complaint would be the claw piece where the tip tasted a bit chalky but I'm not going slam them too hard for that. I've found that to be pretty common.

While I was eating this roll, I noticed that the mayo was applied directly to the roll and not mixed in with the lobster – something I'd never experienced but kinda liked. I also noticed that because of the amount of lobster in this thing, the beefier brioche roll was welcomed to hold it all together. Overall, I was quite pleased with the experience. The fries and cole slaw were tasty too... just too much!

According to the folks who waited on us, they hope to soon expand the business to include lobster bakes and live music at some point down the road. I'm glad someone is finally putting that place to good use and I hope people give them a shot! If you do... let me know what you thought.